Obsession with Identity

In my studies I have been reading a lot about identity, whether in a 19th Century French anarchist context or for a German literature module on the study of the 'self' and the 'other'.  Identity never fails to enthrall us, intrigue, confuse and drive us, more than often, to depair.  'Who am I?' appears to be the fundamental question in everyone's mind.  The way in which you introduce yourself hints at what you think about yourself and what you would like others to know about you.  We commonly start with a brief greeting, an exchange of names, job titles, where we originally come from and whether we are married and have children.

However, I think Elisabeth Elliot puts it well in her book, Let me be a woman.  The question in the search for identity, which often leads people into all kinds of sorrow and heart-ache, should not be 'who am I' but 'whose am I?'  Attempting to discover your identity in complete isolation never works.  It only leads to destructive naval-gazing and a deeper confusion and discontent over the question of identity.  Why is it that when we introduce ourselves we always start by talking about our outward actions and those we have chosen to spend time with?  Because they are a reflection of our feelings, beliefs, tendencies, joys, hurts, decisions and choices we have made.  In essence, they are not our identity, but they do help explain who we are or who we aspire to be.

The problem, however, is that no relationship with another human can ever fully satisfy us.  No job, amount of money, wealth of education or future prospects can conclusively tell us who we are.  We may find parts of ourselves sated for a while.  Our thirst and longing after a defining principle to be quenched momentarily, but it will never eternally satisfy us.  Our identity is far deeper and greater than can be comprehended through a collection of deeds, writings, facts and emotions, otherwise why would even the greatest of writers, thinkers and leaders have carried on in this quest for identity?

Neither can we find our complete identity in simply tracing back our family history.  My Mum works in a cemetary and often has people coming in to trace their ancestry back to local celebrities or, more often, ordinary working-class people!  After all, if we can't discover our identity in our present surroudings we resort to the past.  Family traits (in our family it's the Jewsbury nose...) are passed down, and I daresay even some characteristics, but not one of them ever fully explains our rhyme or reason for being the way we are.

We see ourselves partly then in the reflection of others.  Yet, I would argue that this is completely the wrong way around.  If we start with ourselves, creatures who are limited in our understanding and knowledge of the universe we live in, then we will never, within the short span of our lifetime, discover who we really are or what is our purpose in life.  Instead, we need to look into the face of the One who from the very beginning not only reflected but gave us His likeness.  Our identity as individuals is dependant upon God's identity.  So in looking to the present and the past for clues to our identity we are not wrong, in fact, it simply reveals a more profound trait of the God we have sought to drive out of our own self-fashioned identities.  We were never meant to be isolated, unrelational, stagnant, self-fashioned and destructive.  Rather, we were created with identities that are unique and highly complex, yet which all have their root and fulfilment in God. 

So, our mistake as humans is not our obsession with identity, it is more that we are looking for identity in the wrong place and in the wrong people.  In asking 'whose am I?', we recognise that, in the basic sense, we are all God's in that each human being has been created by Him and for Him.  But just as we find out who we are by tracing back our roots, by asking questions, by seeking knowledge of and intimacy with the ones who have physically brought us into this world, that is, our parents, so we will never find the answer to this identity question until we seek intimacy with God through Jesus Christ, who is the revealed identity of our heavenly Father.